Friday, June 15, 2012

Styled for Reality

I have asked some wonderful local bloggers to write guest posts and I have the awesome and ridiculously funny Michelle aka Blundermum guest posting today. I spit my coffee at the screen laughing whenever I read a new Blundermum post. Here she is....


There’s a discrepancy between fiction and reality we need to address.

Namely, how well dressed people on TV are. They’re not just well styled, but they’re actually fully dressed at all times! Perhaps I’ve been raised in a semi-nudist colony, but if one my friends dropped by to invite me to the movies, this is how the scene would play out:

Friend: Hey, you want to go to a movie?
Me: Hmm, yeah. Suppose. I just need to put on a bra.
Friend: And clean pants.
Me: *looks down at crusted cornflake patch* Huh. When did that happen? Yes, and clean pants.
Me: Can you find my left sneaker?

Etc. Then we miss the session and end up strolling through the shops instead, buying more clothes we won’t wear at home. Or anywhere. I probably still forgot to brush my hair. None of this grabbing-a-jacket-that-was-strategically-hung-by-the-door-and-setting-off business.

In reality, leaving the house is hard work. Then I’ll spend the entire time wishing I could go home and peel off those skinny jeans and finally eat something. If I could be bothered wearing heels, they would come off first, but only because I would have fallen up the stairs and through the door onto my bum, into perfect shoe removing position.

That’s if I make it home alive, some days I suspect my scarf is out to get me. Not only does it drop itself in my coffee, and get stuck in my seatbelt, it actually tightens like a boa constrictor in high winds. 
They never show that on TV.

Women on TV also never get a static zap from synthetic fibres. They never get their watch snagged on their blouse while sneaking a boob scratch, resulting in a severe wardrobe malfunction.

And they never get out of their pyjamas at lunch time, purely for the purpose of putting on a fluffier set instead.
TV has been setting an impossible standard of style and I object. I object as vehemently as someone wearing Elmo pyjamas at 2pm on a Monday afternoon possibly can.

Please drop by and visit Michelle's blog, Blundermum. You won't regret it.

6 comments:

  1. Haha, this gave me a long goooood laugh. Thanks for sharing :)

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  2. I also never see anyone on telly wearing thongs jammed over their socks, because the sneakers felt too dressy for homewear but we still need to go outside to do washing and not get socks dirty. Everyone's with me, right!!?

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    1. Sure, sneakers are way to dressy for home wear. You like a little homebody geisha. Rx

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  3. LOL! Michelle cracks me UP! Those Elmo PJ Pants ? Wants!

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    1. The only thing that missing is a Yoda bathrobe. I really think this would have completed her outfit. Rx

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